Is Your Furniture Dope?

My Grandpa Fred is an impressive guy.

He was raised by a butcher in a Czech neighborhood in Chicago before moving on to work in the meat industry.

There he advised companies like McDonalds and Arby's about the fat content in their Quarter Pounder or the amount of water in their roast beef. 

The man was an expert in his field. And he still is (try his beef tenderloin and try to tell me that he doesn't know what he's doing).

But you can't work forever. And after he retired, he wasn't sure what to do.

Until he found woodworking, a craft that he dedicated himself to. 

He learned everything he could, found like-minded retirees to join him, and eventually opened up a workshop for the local Kiwanis, where they work year-round to make toys for Children's Hospitals.

By taking up this hobby with such dedication and sharing it with his grandson, Big Fred instilled in me a respect for solid workmanship and the beauty of a natural woodgrain. 

So naturally when I visited Vienna, I went to the Imperial Furniture Museum (The Hofmobiliendepot), a place full of perfectly crafted wooden works.

 There, I took pictures of the old-timey toilets and spittoons that I liked. Among other things.

The Imperial Furniture Museum

 Spittoons. Literally the most beautiful spittoons I've ever seen. Royalty spit in these works of art. Royalty.

Spittoons. Literally the most beautiful spittoons I've ever seen. Royalty spit in these works of art. Royalty.

 Not wood. But you still have to appreciate the craftsmanship of these helmets. Plus that eagle is eating a snake. Which is cool. 

Not wood. But you still have to appreciate the craftsmanship of these helmets. Plus that eagle is eating a snake. Which is cool. 

 That is super cool. Imagine being wheeled around in this thing.

That is super cool. Imagine being wheeled around in this thing.

 What a drama queen. "Ooooohhhh. Woe is me!" 

What a drama queen. "Ooooohhhh. Woe is me!" 

 I wish that I could grow facial hair like this. Mutton chops. Mutton chops. Girls be lovin' mutton chops. 

I wish that I could grow facial hair like this. Mutton chops. Mutton chops. Girls be lovin' mutton chops. 

 Some intricate woodwork.

Some intricate woodwork.

 Easily the most badass desk ever? Yup. 

Easily the most badass desk ever? Yup. 

 Sit your cheeks on these majestic poo thrones.

Sit your cheeks on these majestic poo thrones.

 My God. This room is the dopest thing on the planet. 

My God. This room is the dopest thing on the planet. 

 Why does anyone strive for anything other than simplicity when they design? 

Why does anyone strive for anything other than simplicity when they design? 

Lightopia

At the Hofmobiliendepot, there is a pretty illuminating exhibit going on, and it's called Lightopia. (I am super sorry for this pun. Please don't hate me.)

It's full of installations revolving around the history and future of light design. 

Oddly specific? I guess.

A subject matter that lends itself to some really creative objects? Definitely.

 Those are dandelions. Real ones. 

Those are dandelions. Real ones. 

 Dancin' under the cool blue light.

Dancin' under the cool blue light.

 You're 5,000 candles in the wind.... RIP LS.

You're 5,000 candles in the wind.... RIP LS.

 The mommy lamp feeds the baby lamp...

The mommy lamp feeds the baby lamp...